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The Top 3 Male Turnoffs

Ladies, I want to discuss a subject that I was discussing with my friends during ladies' night out. We were talking about how to attract a good man, and then I asked them, "What do you think turn men off by our behaviors?"  We know it is important to know how to get his engine roaring, but it is also a good idea to know what can destroy the engine. We need to know what turns men on and off. By knowing what types of behaviors will destroy, the engine will help us to stay in the driver's seat to keep the spark, and engine going in the right direction for a long relaxed ride.  After a heated discussion, with the girls, we came up with what we believe are men's top three turnoffs by women's behaviors:
  • Turnoff # 1: Trying to change him
  • Turnoff # 2: Flakiness
  • Turnoff # 3: Ultimatums
Read below for more detail:

Turnoff # 1: Trying to change him

I don't know one woman who has not tried to change at least one man in her life time either intentionally or unintentionally.  You heard these saying before: I had to train him, or I had to retrain him.  Now ladies, if it was up to us, some of us would change the person  from top to bottom, how he dresses, his hair cut, how he eats, how he drives, how he walks, etc etc.

Which makes one wonder, what did you like about the person from the start if there is so much you want to change?    Ladies, if this is you...just stop it...there is a famous saying that "Women marry men hoping they'll change. Men marry women hoping they won't." 

Let's spend more time on accepting them "as is" even when he chews with his mouth open.  Moreover, if you can't accept him "as is" then don't date him. As after all of your hard work of nagging/ yelling about him changing, he may be well-groomed and trained for someone else who will accept him for who he is.

Turnoff # 2: Flakiness

Ladies, raise your hand if you fall into this category of not committing to plans or at the last minute, canceling plans or sabotaging the plans because you are not really into the guy, or your hair is not right, or you are bloated as well as being flaky just to be a flake. If you are constantly saying, "maybe" or I will pencil you in, then you may have given your guy the impression that he is an option vs. a priority.  Just think about that for a moment, would you stick around with a guy who canceled plans continuously. Let me answer for you ---"No" 

So let's be a woman about it, and in Wendy Williams' voice, "Say it like you mean" because if you are not going to keep the date, then don't even agree to it in the first place.  When he stop asking you out altogether, look in the mirror and ask yourself whether you were being flaky and/or if you were making him an option vs. a priority.

Turnoff # 3: Ultimatums

Again, raise your hand if you have done this one, where you said these famous words, "You better" or "If you don't, then I will."  Not only are these types of ultimatums often empty promises, but they are often ineffective.  Because if you don't follow through, you come across as going back to my number two  of being flaky as well as my number one  as trying to change him.   Keep in mind that a healthy, vibrant, and long term relationship, don't need ultimatums as when you are communicating honestly, openly, and directly than ultimatums are unnecessary.

The point of dating is about meeting a variety of different people, so by knowing what are your turn offs and what are the men's turn offs, it will perhaps lead to less frustration and more health positive dating/relationships experiences.

What other women's behaviors turn men offs?